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Joke of the Day – December 21, 2011

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A Man’s Guide to the Female Vocabulary FINE This is the word women use to end an argument when they feel they are right and you need to shut up. Never use “fine” to describe how a woman looks – this will cause you to have one of those arguments. FIVE MINUTES This is half an hour. It is equivalent to the five minutes that your football game is going to last before you take out the trash, so it’s an even trade. NOTHING This means “something,” and you should be on your toes. “Nothing” is usually used to describe the feeling a woman has of wanting to turn you inside out, upside down, and backwards. “Nothing” usually signifies an argument that will last “Five Minutes” and end with “Fine” GO AHEAD (With Raised Eyebrows) This is a dare. One that will result in a woman getting upset over “Nothing” and will end with the word “Fine” GO AHEAD (Normal Eyebrows) This means “I give up” or “do what you want because I don’t care” You will get a “Raised Eyebrow Go Ahead” in just a few minutes, followed by “Nothing” and “Fine” and she will talk to you in about “Five Minutes” when she cools off. LOUD SIGH This is not actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A “Loud Sigh” means she thinks you are an idiot at that moment, and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you over “Nothing” SOFT SIGH Again, not a word, but a non-verbal statement. “Soft Sighs” mean that she is content. Your best bet is to not move or breathe, and she will stay content. THAT’S OKAY This is one of the most dangerous statements that a woman can make to a man. “That’s Okay” means that she wants to think long and hard before paying you back for whatever it is that you have done. “That’s Okay” is often used with the word “Fine” and in conjunction with a “Raised Eyebrow.” GO AHEAD! At some point in the near future, you are going to be in some mighty big trouble. PLEASE DO This is not a statement, it is an offer. A woman is giving you the chance to come up with whatever excuse or reason you have for doing whatever it is that you have done. You have a fair chance with the truth, so be careful and you shouldn’t get a “That’s Okay” THANKS A woman is thanking you. Do not faint. Just say you’re welcome. THANKS A LOT This is much different from “Thanks.” A woman will say, “Thanks A Lot” when she is really ticked off at you. It signifies that you have offended her in some callous way, and will be followed by the “Loud Sigh.” Be careful not to ask what is wrong after the “Loud Sigh,” as she will only tell you “Nothing”]]]]> ]]>

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Find a gold ticket, have a chance to win a candy factory

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David Klein, aka the Candyman, is giving away a candy factory

Lovers of puzzles and jellybeans have a chance to win their very own candy factory.

David Klein, affectionately known as The Candyman, is excited to announce a worldwide treasure hunt. Klein, the founder of The Jelly Belly jellybeans and Tricky Treasures, is getting ready to retire, but not before he has some fun and not before he gives back to everyone who loves the candy industry like he does.

David and his partner have started going across the U.S. hiding gold tickets in the form of necklaces in places they come across with an interesting story. Plans are to have multiple treasure hunts for these gold tickets in each state. You can join one of their treasure hunts which are launching right now at www.TheGoldTicket.com.

The biggest and best part of these treasure hunts is that anyone who joins at least one treasure hunt, will be eligible to search for The Ultimate Treasure: the key to one of his candy factories and an all-expense paid trip and education to a candy-making university. He will add this treasure hunt after all the states have had a chance to play. Each treasure hunt is valued at $5,000 and cost is only $49.99 to enter a hunt. Each treasure hunt has a strict limit of 1,000 participants, no exceptions.

“With The Gold Ticket Treasure hunt, our goal is to get people out and about with their families. Grandma and Grandpa can even join with the kids and grandkids,” Klein said in a release. “Take videos of your treasure hunt experiences for possible inclusion in our upcoming series.”

Please go to www.TheGoldTicket.com and watch David’s documentary, “Candyman The David Klein Story,” for free and be inspired. Also, join the Facebook page for more information. The Gold Ticket Treasure Hunt would be a GREAT gift this holiday season. Join David on this Willy Wonka® fantastical journey across America and see if you can find one of his elusive gold tickets.

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Just Plain Fun

Vote for the best state flag design

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Share your opinion! Below are ten options for the new Mississippi state flag. Nine are contenders to be chosen by the Mississippi Legislature in Sept, and one is just a staff favorite here at Vicksburg Daily News. Let us know what you think!

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Booze Fairies are ‘dusting’ Vicksburg with the joy of giving

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In a time when most of us could use some good news and something to make us smile, a group on Facebook is doing just that.

Booze Fairies of Vicksburg is made up of women in the area who just want to make someone’s day a little better.

Women who sign up in the private group make a short list of the kinds of little things that would make them happy—a favorite cocktail, snack, or other little tidbits. Other women in the group can choose one or more people to make happy, whether it’s women they know or random strangers in their neighborhood. The women put together baskets or boxes with goodies and deliver them to other members. How much to spend is completely up to the giver, who can remain anonymous or not.

Think of it like a big game of Secret Santa, only for the times of COVID-19.

“There are no rules,” said member Heather Williams. “just go make somebody happy.”

Williams, who taught elementary school at the Sherman Avenue School for 25 years, said she’s delivered four baskets so far, two to women she knows and two others to strangers. Everything she bought was from the Dollar Tree store. She just made sure it was fun.

She used glittery party hats for her baskets, then added balloons, a pair of sunglasses, candy and crackers. Just little things, she said.

“It’s nice to get them,” she said, “and actually, it’s fun to go deliver, too. … You wouldn’t believe how much fun that is.”

After women get “dusted” or “boozed,” they will put up a photo of their goodies on the group page.

“You get to show it off,” Williams said. “It’s just neat. I thought it was a great idea.”

“I’m just sick of people being ugly to each other,” she said, and this makes her feel good and makes the recipients feel good. It’s a win-win.

Retailers, such as Toney’s 61N Liquor & Wine, are reportedly starting to offer discounts for Booze Fairy purchases.  

Williams has also received a basket with Margarita mix, Funyons, gum, Skittles, a pretty little magnet and a candle.

“I was having a rough day, and I got home and there it was,” she said. “It made me feel better.”

Booze Fairies of Vicksburg was started by Whitney Porter and has nearly 3,000 members.

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